On May 13 I lost my son to Pneumococcal Meningitis. I really didn’t think it was a serious disease anymore as it was part of the routine immunization schedule for children.
My son Allen Beaty was 33 years old. A week earlier, he had the sniffles and he asked me to get cold medicine. At the time I didn’t think anything of it as we live in southern Ontario and the weather was wet, cold, and warm. He seemed fine by the end of the week which is not unusual as he always got over colds very fast.
The next week he went out with his friend on Monday. He did tell his friend that his ears were plugged and he couldn’t unplug them. If we went to hospital the week before who knows what the outcome would have been? I went to work on Tuesday. He was going to school to get his grade 12. On Wednesday he went to school, then stopped into work to get his pay cheque. He came home at 11 and said he had a headache, which I didn’t think anything of. I went to work at 2 pm and received a phone call at 5:30 pm from his place of work. As he was always early, I rushed home and as I went in I heard a crash from his room. I opened the door and his dog flew out like she was scared (she was not herself for weeks as she did not understand why he was gone without saying goodbye).
He was sitting on the floor with his head back and swaying back and forth. We had a small heat wave so I figured it was heat stroke. So I tried to ask if he wanted a cold shower, but no words came out of him. Even his eyes didn’t open. He did manage to get on his feet, though I don’t know how. I called 911 and ambulance, fire, police and mental health came. After 20 minutes they got him into the ambulance.
Once at hospital, I had to wait 5 hours in the sitting room waiting to hear what was wrong. They took him for a CAT scan and did blood work. I could not go in and see him as, at the time, the meningitis took away his ability to talk. I am glad they didn’t let me in to see him as he was as I did not want to remember him that way.
The doctor said they were going to send him up to ICU and hoping they could figure out what was wrong with him. So I was advised to go home, which I did. They called just after midnight and said he went into cardiac arrest and I was advised to go back, as if he goes again they felt they were not going to be able to revive him. When we (my ex-husband and I) went back is when they gave us the results of the tests and told us it was meningitis and his brain was swollen (as a mom I knew he was gone). They had hoped to drain the fluid on his brain but did say that, if he survived, he may not be the same. They could not do it early Thursday morning they said there was nothing they could do.. So Friday morning they pronounced him brain dead on May 13. We donated his liver and kidneys, so he did save 3 lives.
They kept him on life support for 3 days for the organ donations. Even though I knew he was gone I could go up and see him. So early Monday morning we went to say goodbye. I kissed him goodbye and they wheeled him away. At out hospital it is very impressive when they do organ donations because, when they wheeled him out, the doctors and nurses stopped what they were doing and stood up in support. It was very emotional. He was gone in less than 8 hours. I had no idea that a disease could take a healthy young man down as fast as it did.
I know he is fine and he is with my mom whom I lost 6 weeks earlier.
I know he is fine and he is with my mom whom I lost 6 weeks earlier. She loved hummingbirds and my daughter-in-law had a hummingbird tattoo. When I hugged my daughter and saw the tattoo, that was the first sign I knew Allen was fine. Our neighbors made me a lemon loaf which my mother loved. She loved anything to do with lemon so that was another indication he was at peace. Allen also loved ice caps from Tim Hortons and the next day there was an ice cap lid beside my car. So all these things, together, indicated to us that Allen was at peace.
He had many friends I discovered through Facebook and they all messaged me to see how I was, which was therapy for me. We are having memorial on the 18th and after that I feel it will get more difficult. But he was the kind of son who wouldn’t want us to constantly look at his obituary, so, for him, I know I can get through this.
Thank you for letting me share my story. I also am doing my part with a monthly donation of $20.00.
Lynne Beaty (St. Thomas, Ontario)